45 Things a child can do to Honor his/her parents before they die, a book review

Home › Forums › 45 Things a child can do to Honor his/her parents before they die, a book review

Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
  • Author
    Posts
  • January 13, 2008 at 9:37 pm #5605
    Rob_Hugo@PortNW
    Keymaster

    The word parent in Korean is Bu-Mo-Nhim (the Nhim is honorific, a term that finds difficulty in an equivalent English translation). It is a word laden with all sorts of feelings, ranging from deep affection to a kind-of-heaviness. For any honorable child, your parents are everything. They not only gave you life, they sacrificed their well-being so that you may succeed and carry on the family tradition. As a child, this did not really sink in; as a teenager, I rebelled against such notion of filial piety as archaic. But strangely enough, I find myself coming to a full-circle as an adult. I see my parents in a lot of my life reflection and I'm beginning to see some of the wisdom of their decision as I trudge through life and apply some of their teaching. What irony!

    So when I came upon this book, the title caught my eye: "45 things a child can do to honor his/her parent before they die." Here are some of the things listed in the book (the words are translated from Korean):

    1. Remember to pack their favorite persimmon with their meals.
    2. Create a secret bank account for them, like your life depended on it.
    3. To never utter a word that will pierce through their heart.
    4. To display a childish vulnerability in front of your parents to let them know that you
    need them.
    5. Call them at least once a day.
    6. Tell your father that you love him, verbally.
    7. Buy health-related things that will create longevity in their lives.
    8. Actively participate in a hobby that your parents enjoy.
    9. To honor your parents during a ceremony where you are honored.
    10. Always remember their birthday.

    And the list goes on. I thought the suggestions were a bit' hokey at first but I decided to give it a go. I tried number one--I gave them a box of their favorite persimmon snack. I just did not expect to get the tearful gratitude from both of them. It was so unexpected. They kept saying in Korean "Hmmm, she is a big girl now, bringing persimmon to her mother/father...hmmm." They would not stop talking about it for days! What surprised me was how humbling and out-of-sorts it made me feel--that a such a small gesture would mean so much to them and how long it took me to do this. This affirmed one thing about human beings in general--it is not so much the big things but the little, day to day gestures that matter to a person. Korean or not.[Edit by="seun on Jan 14, 10:53:15 AM"][/Edit]
    [Edit by="seun on Jan 21, 11:38:32 PM"][/Edit]
    [Edit by="seun on Jan 21, 11:38:54 PM"][/Edit]
    [Edit by="seun on Jan 21, 11:39:24 PM"][/Edit]

    January 21, 2008 at 12:33 am #33803
    Anonymous
    Guest

    I was very moved by your post, not only because I know you to be a generous person but also because the history that is imbued in the book and your family legacy. This book sounds like a great way for me to segue into Korean identity in my classes after we finish the China unit and before we begin the Japan unit. I can see my Korean students benefiting from the character building aspects and all my other students discussing what their 45 things might be in their families. This will be a great application of Confucianism in East Asian cultures Thanks so much for sharing your personal story and the book.

    Where can I get this book? Is it translated from Korean into English?

    Betse [Edit by="eamador on Jan 21, 8:38:05 AM"][/Edit]
    [Edit by="eamador on Jan 21, 8:39:07 AM"][/Edit]
    [Edit by="eamador on Jan 21, 8:40:19 AM"][/Edit]

    January 21, 2008 at 3:34 pm #33804
    Anonymous
    Guest

    Hi Betse,

    The book, unfortunately, is in Korean. However, I'll be more than happy to lend it to you--what about having some of your Korean students translate the reading to you in English? I'm sure they would be excited to do that. I am encouraged that you will bring Korea into the forefront--it's about time. The lessons would be so interesting. And, I appreciate your generous words--I think our class as a whole worked well together to form a good group. I enjoyed our discussions (and more to follow in the future). We can even get together for a Dumpling Soup Night -- Chinese New Year is just around the corner.

    You might want to think about taking the upcoming workshop for educators via Korea Academy -- it is April 12 and April 26, two Saturdays. You receive a variety of materials about Korea for your classroom, hear wonderful speakers, and taste Korean cuisine. You just need to apply for it and I believe, they are accepting applications. Take a look at it: http://www.koreaacademy.org
    Let me know what you think! BTW, thanks for the Starbucks!

    Sincerely,
    Sarah

    January 22, 2008 at 8:27 am #33805
    Anonymous
    Guest

    How could we be able to pass on these simple but outstanding virtues to our students so that we can help to cultivate respect for parents in our community? If we could plant such a seed and encourage it to grow,it would carry over into the classrooms, the playground and later on into the workplace.After all charity begins at home.

    January 27, 2008 at 5:49 pm #33806
    Anonymous
    Guest

    We are in the business of planting seeds into young minds and even if some of them do not have the ideal home situation, we, as educators, can incorporate respect in the way we run our class. The students do spend a lot of hours with us and they are influenced through our interactions. Just last week, I was speaking to a former student of mine and she started to share about her excitement over a project she was working on. What really blew me away was how she stopped herself in mid-sentence to apologize for her interruption and proceeded to wait for me to finish what I was saying. I was...speechless and impressed! That really made my day.

    January 28, 2008 at 3:59 pm #33807
    Anonymous
    Guest

    That's great. I think that's a large part of what we do as teachers. Even though I teach chemistry, as an educator, I believe we need to teach our students how to deal with the real world including skills on ethics and culture. Thanks for sharing this with us.

    March 2, 2008 at 2:23 am #33808
    Anonymous
    Guest

    I believe that many of the kids now days have lost respect for their parents. I see it in my classroom how the students speak of their parents, and how they talk to them infront of other adults. It really dissapoints me that parents can't get respect from their kids and many times it is because the parents also mistreat the kids out in public. I will keep this book in mind and hopefully i can find it in English. Kids only give respect when it is giving to them, I've seen that many times they respect more the teacher than the parent.

  • Author
    Posts
Viewing 7 posts - 1 through 7 (of 7 total)
  • You must be logged in to reply to this topic.